Ice Cube just dropped his newest CD Raw Footage, and Madd Rap Fan says it’s pretty good. Though we concur with that general analysis, it appears Mr. Oshea Jackson has continued to invoke gangster imagery and ethos in this current artistic endeavor. Now, we here at GrownHeadz wouldn’t dare to posit that there are better, more worthwhile and relevant topics for the wordsmith to mine. Wait, no. That’s exactly what we’re suggesting. A song on any one of these 5 topics would have resulted in a more relevant, relatable, hell, realer release. For the next album, Cube might consider:
1. My Bougie Kid Wants to be a Gangsta
We all know Ice Cube has been in the game a minute, and his finances are rock-solid. Cube is straight. Didn’t he say he’s been making rap money “since the 10th grade?”
His eldest, Oshea Jackson Jr., was born with a platinum spoon in his mouth, right around the time of Cube’s second album, 1991’s Death Certificate. Now 17, Cube Jr. has never had to snatch a chain, duck a cop or flip a burger—really, neither did his dad, who at the time of penning Straight Outta Compton wasn’t even allowed to curse at home, but that’s another post altogether.
Lil’ Cube has probably been getting dap from his “homies” at Pretty Boy High ever since Richie Rich discovered Mr. Jackson used to make hits and downloaded Kill At Will. Though he has not and will never know the meaning of hard times, suddenly he’s bangin’ and slangin’ and busting weak rhymes at the ski lodge about how he’s in the “family business.” Cube, handle that the way you do best: put Bay Bruh on blast in the studio, and cut that shit out from jump street.
2. Today was a Good Day (Rich Man Remix)
Cube’s original song portrayed a good day in South Central: good food, a little sex, no cops stressing, and getting paid. That was cool for back in the day, but what’s REALLY good? Talk about breakfast in Paris and lunch in Montenegro, that million-dollar real estate deal you ran before stepping out to pick up the new custom-dipped Bentley, the community center you blessed with 100 laptops or the old folks home where you paid everybody’s rent for a year. We want to know how you’re really living—make us say “Daaaaamn!”
3. Making movies
We’ve followed Cube’s characters since Doughboy Baker, and watched him move from in front of the camera to behind it, directing and producing. But there’s a story that hasn’t been told. Art imitates life on the back lot, and nobody could break down the back lot like Cube. What whitebread director punked a real-life gangster, which egos aren’t in line with their paychecks, and how many zeroes did Nia turn down for no booty scene in Are We There Yet? The man had to try, for all of us.
4. Being married
Cube has kept it tight with Kimberly Woodruff since 1992, with four growing kids to boot. Hey Mr. Jackson, as one married man to another, I KNOW you’ve got some stories to tell about fighting, sticking together, being faithful (or not) and all that. There’s been times we all “damn near had to wreck a ‘ho” before remembering she’s got papers on us, plus we love her and whatnot. Speak on it! Your fans are wading into the same waters you’re in, and it might save more hip-hop nuptials to know What Would Ice Cube Do.
5. Black Hollywood
Let’s hear a new Tales from the Darkside, black Hollywood-style. Hanging out with Samuel Jackson, dropping by Anthony Anderson’s house for football, Mike Epps talking ‘bout “lemme hold a few ends till Sunday.” (You can forget about that change, partna!) Most actors don’t have a venue to tell the world what it’s like amongst the West Coast Negro elite. You do, so do that.
This list isn’t jut for Ice Cube. The world is full of rappers who are legitimately grown men and women with families and problems just like us. Ice T once said if you tell your story, other people who live that story will buy your record (he was referring to Eminem’s legions of po-white fans). All we’re saying here at GrownHeadz is grown rappers should talk about grown thangs—otherwise they run the risk of looking foolish, cause everybody knows they’re too old for that silly shhhhhhhhh.